Bereavement Doula

Apparently last week was "World Doula Week," and I meant to post this then.

On that note, I want to share that a dream I've had for years is (Lord willing) coming true. This summer, I'll become a Birth and Bereavement Doula through stillbirthday's amazing program. They had a special deal offering the course for 80% off and I couldn't pass it up. :)

I believe this will better prepare me to love and minister to others walking through pregnancy and infant loss. The Lord knows what He has in store.

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Lily's Name in a Movie!

I am so excited to share that my precious Lily Katherine Allen-Ball's name is going to be in the credits of a new movie coming out about stillbirth called Return to Zero. I am so proud to call her my daughter. :-)

In an exclusive section to appear BEFORE the other credits, the film will read:

This film was made possible through the generous donations of StillBirthday Families

Immediately below this line, will list the names of many precious babies in Heaven, including my girl! This is a special prominant section of the credits and will be highly visible!

For a short time, anyone who donated $5 to the movie could have their child's name added...now it has gone back up to $250. I'm thankful I made my donation in time!

The movie will be distributed in theaters around the country at some point either at the end of 2013 or beginning of 2014. That's the estimate that they are currently giving. And how awesome that I will get to go see it in the actual theatre and will see my daughter's name on the screen!! I will definitely post again when I know it's coming out.

Thank you so much to stillbirthday and Return to Zero for making this possible! Check out the Return to Zero website for more information on the movie. Consider supporting it as well if you are able. And become a fan on their facebook page for updates. This is such an important message that many people need to hear/see. We need to break the silence of stillbirth. I am proud to be Lily's voice! Her life matters, as all the little ones who we must say hello and goodbye to at once.

I will share more about the movie when I see it and will be sure to post a photo of Lily's name in the credits! I'm sure when I finally do see it, I will cry. To know she is making a difference. To see her name on a movie will be a precious reminder that she is real, loved, missed, important, remembered...always.

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the BLESSING of a photo

About two weeks ago, somehow I found my way to the website stillbirthday. As a believer, I know it was not by coincidence, but the very hand of God that led me there. I clicked on the link that shows photos of the different gestational ages of babies who were miscarried or stillborn. They are listed so parents can know what to expect if they know beforehand they will be experiencing a pregnancy loss. Or, if they already had a pregnancy loss and never saw the baby, they can see about what size the baby would have been.

I scrolled down the page and saw a photo of a 6-week gestational age baby that was miscarried. My breath caught in my throat as my mind wonders back to February 2009, to thoughts of my own 6-week gestational age child. I clicked on the photo and it led me to Bethany's blog. The photo is of her precious child, who she has named Blessing, that she miscarried.

Although it is a photo of Blessing, it feels as if I am seeing my Luke Shiloh. God wanted me to see it because it has brought me to a whole new place in my grief journey over the loss of my little precious child. I am so thankful Bethany shared it. I have only ever seen textbook images of babies this gestation and now, because of her sharing this photo, the Lord has brought greater healing and closure. My heart was very heavy when I saw the photo, yet I felt a deeper connection to this baby in Heaven and like my mind now understands in a deeper way that this was a real person.

"A person's a person, no matter how small." -Dr. Seuss

Seeing the arms, fingers, head, body...it is so powerful, beautiful and amazing. I pray that whoever sees this photo, whether you are Pro-Life or Pro-Choice, that your eyes and heart would be opened like never before. This is not tissue or a blob of cells, this is not a choice. This is a precious, valuable, sacred LIFE. An unmistakably human life. Look how our God forms a baby in a matter of just 6 weeks in the quiet, secret place of his mother's womb. It is such an incredible miracle to behold.

Blessing's life was not in vain and neither is my Luke Shiloh's life. The Lord is speaking volumes through each of their lives, telling the world how precious each unborn baby is to him. Blessing and Luke Shiloh are together, dancing eternally with the Savior, on streets of gold.

If you've had an early miscarriage, I pray this photo brings you healing. If you've had an abortion early in your pregnancy, I pray this photo will bring closure and that you will look to Christ to bring you the healing only He can give.

One single picture speaks what a thousand words cannot.

"I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know that full well." ~Psalm 139:14


Please take the time to leave a comment on this post to help me win a blog contest! Whoever has the most comments wins. Thanks! :)

I am also hosting a blog contest, that ends on Lily Katherine's second Heavenly birthday, March 16th. Feel free to enter!

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