Tuesday, April 21, 2015

"I Just Love Carrying My Baby"

I am going through old emails to find the correspondence between my friend Bex and I from when I was pregnant so I can print them out to keep it in Lily's memory chest. After Lily's father, Bex was the second person to know about Lily.

Here is something I wrote to Bex when I was 25 weeks pregnant, in November 2009:

"I have been feeling Lily moving and kicking so much! It is such an amazing feeling. I just love carrying my Baby and I feel like I will miss it when I do give birth. It's such a special time to feel another life inside me and know that it's her little foot or hand I feel. :)"

And here's from a conversation we had online:

Bex: Hannah Rose!!
Hannah: HEY!
Bex: How are you??
Hannah: I'm really well.. Lily is moving around really silly right now.
Bex: Aww! Isn't that one of the best feelings in the world though? :)
Hannah: Yeah, it is. It's so special. Lily just nestles up on my right side too, it's so funny.
Bex: aww:)

These are things I'd forgotten, like her preferring my right side. I'm so glad I have that record of how I treasured our time together, her only time on Earth. And I had no idea just how much I would miss carrying her. Sigh. I am certain that one of the greatest gifts I will ever receive in my life was getting those months with Lily and being chosen to be her forever mommy.

This photo beautifully captures life in the womb. Yes, Lily *did* live and wasn't an "almost baby."


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