Monday, May 9, 2016

Please Be Born Soon

I'm on edge today.

My niece's due date is in 3 days and my sister-in-law has an appointment today.

I had an appointment 3 days before Lily's due date as well. Everything was fine. Lily looked perfect on the ultrasound screen (photo from that day below).

And then the next day she was gone...

I know obviously that just because it happened to me doesn't mean the exact same thing is going to happen to her too. I honestly believe that my niece will be born healthy and alive.

But, that doesn't keep me from thinking about it. That doesn't keep me from wanting her to be born as quickly as possible, to make sure she gets here with wide-eyes and a beautiful cry. That doesn't keep me from wondering why the doctor won't ensure her being born this week, because she'd be safer on the outside than possibly dying on the inside.

I keep thinking about how if Lily were born on this date of gestation in my pregnancy, she would most likely be here. And if my niece is born today, she will most likely be here to grow up.

That's the way my mind words. After it happens to you, you fear it happening to those you love too. Because it doesn't just happen "to other people." It happens to those who least expect it. It  happens to healthy full-term babies and healthy mothers with no warning signs.

It happened to my daughter.

And I beg God it doesn't happen to my niece too.

Please pray for my niece to be born healthy and soon. And that I would give my anxiety over this to the Lord.


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