Monday, January 25, 2016

Less Than Two Months

My stomach is literally in knots, with the knowledge now in the forefront of my mind that in less than two months, we'll be celebrating yet another one of Lily's birthdays. Both Kala and my mom recently said how they can't believe it's nearly been a year since her 5th birthday, when we took the comfort boxes to the hospital where Lily was born and I got my long-awaited tattoo.

Each year for her day, I like to do something different and special. I've already been to her spot in Virginia for one of her birthdays, and we went to the hospital and took the boxes, which is something I've wanted to do for years. Now that we've spent her day in the city where she was born and in the town where she's laid to rest, I have decided for her 6th birthday this year, I'd like to do something else I've been wanting to do.

This year, I am planning on and praying it works out for my mom and I to spend a few, or even just a couple, days on the North Carolina Coast. I looove the beach and live close enough (only 2 hours away) that it's totally doable. The Carolina Coast reminds me of Lily because I spent a few days there when I was carrying her in the fall of 2009.

This year, I feel the need to simply relax and be on Lily's birthday. I want to be still in my memories of her and my thanking God for her life, and the beach has a way of fostering a peaceful atmosphere like that. The sites, sounds, and smells of the beach make my soul breathe deeply and calmly. I just need this time away. I think it will be a sweet time of remembrance for two older generations celebrating the third.

I have some other things planned and usual traditions I'd like to keep up with. For one thing, I am going to be donating one boy comfort box and one girl comfort box to Lily's hospital. We'll of course also be having something red-velvet. But on March 16th and at least a day before and after it, I want to just be with my mom, remembering our precious little flower.

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