Monday, February 29, 2016

Her Heart and Mouth Confessing Jesus' Name

As I was blogging earlier this morning, I was listening to a Bethany Dillon playlist on YouTube. The music was softly playing, but my ears picked up certain words to the song that was on.

The song is called "You're the Best Song." Here are the lyrics:

Good morning
You and the sun are up before I'm ready
But ready or not, you need me
So here I am

I'm learning that in the long hard days
There is beauty
Do you know my favorite place to see it
It's when I look at you

And though I'm tired now
You're worth every sleepless night
You're worth it all, cause I know...

You're the best song I'll ever write
And we're humming and dancing through the years together
You're the best song I'll ever write
And I pray you'll hear Jesus in it when you're older

I remember when you were just a heartbeat that I heard
and now our eyes meet
Forever is not enough to love you

Every prayer for you is like a seed in the ground
Every tear I cry is like rain
And in its due season
I pray a harvest will be found
Your heart and mouth confessing Jesus' name
Your heart and mouth confessing Jesus' name

The song is clearly about the love between a mother and her child. My heart sinks with the words that remind me of everything I didn't get to experience with Lily. I didn't have any long, hard days with her. She never woke up needing me early in the morning. My sleepless nights were because of grief, not because of caring for my baby. We're not humming and dancing through the years together. I remember her sweet heartbeat... little did I know that's one of the only memories I'd get with her. And our eyes never did meet. It's ironic I just wrote a post a couple days ago about how much I ache over not having seen Lily's eyes while she was alive.

But even still... even though my motherhood looks different than this song, different than how motherhood looks to most mothers, forever is still not enough to love my Lily girl. She was still worth it all... worth the sleepless nights of grief, worth the difficult pregnancy, worth the labor and delivery, and every stretch mark. She is worth loving through it all.

And the most beautiful part in it all is the comfort I have in knowing I will never have to wonder if Lily will love and serve Jesus. Her heart and her mouth are already confessing Jesus' name. His was the first face she saw. And His name was the first word she spoke.

Listen to the song below (email subscribers click HERE).


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