Thursday, March 6, 2014

What's Mine is Yours

There is a song I heard last year that I was recently thinking of again and realized I never shared it here. It is called "What's Mine is Yours" by Katherine Nelson (she shares my girl's middle name). The song really touches on many things from stillbirth to adoption to unplanned pregnancy... so many things that are close to my heart.

When I first heard the song and saw the video, I was amazed at how it tells the story of both my dear friend Bex and I. The first part of the song is about a woman who loses her baby like I did... all the excitement and plans for a new baby then your world crumbling as the doctor tells you your baby's heart has stopped beating, but "you're young, there'll be others" (I can't tell you how many times people have said that to me, as if one baby could ever replace another). Then the second part of the song is about a young woman placing her baby for adoption like Bex did. The Lord used our precious little ones to bring us together and to bless us in friendship (you can read about our friendship HERE. We both had unplanned pregnancies as young women). As Bex said when I first shared the song with her, it's like it was written for us/our friendship. Listening to it reminds me of precious times we've had together, sharing our hearts and our love for our children.

Anyways, the song is really moving and beautiful. You can watch the music video for it below or by clicking HERE. I have included the lyrics as well as some reflections.


What's Mine is Yours
by Katherine Nelson and Deanna Harper

Counting down days since nine months last summer
From the baby quilts to the sunshine light-switch cover
All the plans she made
Wall-papered dreams she made for him someday

Doctor hardly glanced her way shut off the monitor
As he walked out the door said “You’re young, there’ll be others”
No sirens or loud screams
No rushing or comforting
It was just over

On the longest road toward home
She parked in the church lot and cried
And said

What’s mine is yours
It’s always been
What slips through my hands has your fingerprints on it
I’m letting go
Remembering
Though Heaven’s doors feel shut they’re wide open
What’s mine is yours

Teenage girl clinging to the gates of mercy
Holding the weight of the world and her newborn baby
Trying her best to be brave
Wrapped in hope giving him away to a longing family

When her courage met their eyes she saw
Somehow her baby was born to be in their arms
And cried

(Chorus)

In this life we come and go and say goodbye
But there’s more than we can see with our own eyes
And when my faith’s a thread-bare blanket and I can’t take it anymore
I remember

What’s mine is yours

I’m letting go
Remembering
Though Heaven’s doors feel shut they’re wide open
What’s mine is yours

I pray that I never lose sight of the truth that what's mine is the Lord's. I was never promised I would get to raise Lily. I was never even promised the time I had with her. It says in the Bible that children are a gift from the Lord (Psalm 127:3). Lily was a gift sent from Heaven, a gift with a purpose. A gift I am more thankful for than words could express. The Lord fulfilled the purposes He sent her for then and continues to fulfill the purpose of her life and legacy now. Though she never took a breath in this world, I believe with everything in me that her legacy is alive and will have breath forever. 

"What slips through my hands has your fingerprints on it." The Lord was not surprised by Lily's death. His fingerprints are on her life and her death. His fingerprints are on my life now. 

Even when "Heaven's doors feel shut they're wide open." Even when I feel like I am forgotten in my grief, He is there. "There's more than we can see with our own eyes." God is always working, always moving, even when I can't understand what He's doing or why.

What's mine is Yours... my children, my dreams, my hopes. They are all Yours, my King... through the yearning and the pain. I surrender all to Jesus.

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This post left me:

2 comments:

  1. How beautiful! I've actually struggled with this so very much. Early in my marriage my husband and I decided not to use birth control because we wanted Him to orchestrate our family. Each time I've gotten pregnant, this has been my prayer and I've given each child back to Him. And then He allowed one to go back home. Devastated I realized the significance of what I'd been praying and struggled with it each time.... sometimes only winning the battle at the last minute only to have Him allow the baby back into heaven before birth yet again. Such a beautiful song ! Thanks for sharing it.

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  2. I miss you. And sometimes I want to just sit with you and talk about our bundles of joy and how they have changed who we are and our relationship with God. Love you and think of you often. <3

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